(mini gummy bears everywhere)Spring Break Day #1
The 2yr old has been waking up all night long to get in my bed. She sleeps for a little bit but then by 5:30am she is wide awake wrapping her little arms around my neck trying to strangle me with her hugs in my sleep. There are usually two kids in my bed each morning.
I am not a morning person, so I grumpily tell them it's not time to get up and to go back to sleep. It fails every time.
This time I didn't get up. I laid in my bed and listened to the kids sneak around getting into things. I knew they were making messes. I threatened that they better get everything picked up before I came out. It failed.
OH, THE MESS!
I didn't have it in me to do anything. So we went to Barrow's with the cousins and ate pizza. Then we spent the day at the park and got slushies. I don't even remember what we ate for dinner.
Bath, bed, everyone tucked in. I was stood up, felt sad, disappointed. Watched the Marriage Ref on hulu (funny made me laugh). Stayed up way too late.
Day #2
Same 2yr old woke me up all night. Two kids in my bed, up way too early. Let the kids play around the house. Got everyone ready, it is time consuming to do 3 girls hair.
Ate lunch at my mom's house with my sister. Couldn't really eat, no appetite.
My sister babysat while I went to the temple (bless her heart). I know she was tired.
Went with a heavy heart and I had to pee the whole time. So I guess I had a heavy bladder too. Gross.
Came home with a sad heart.
My sister warned me that the kids were dirty and she gave them earthworms. But not to worry they all died. The kids picked a bunch of grandmas flowers for me with lots of bugs.
Dinner, baths, bed. . .
And now is when I ignore the messy house and sink full of dishes. I will probably stay up way too late because I am not ready for another day.
It is so hard to push yourself and put on a happy face when there is so much heartache inside. I don't want my children to feel that. They ask questions that I can't answer and that makes my heart hurt more. They are the one's that I cry for.
Tomorrow I am going to try my hardest to not be a big sad puddle of tears. I am going to soak up every little smile and giggle. After all it is going to be St. Patrick's Day!
