Friday Letters

Dear Children, ahhh it's summer vacation from school. It's been a fun week of relaxing, for the most part. Dear Swimming Pool, I have a feeling we will be visiting nearly every day. It is a good feeling when all your kids can swim without you being in the water with them the whole time or having to chase them around. It also helps that they have fun together. Dear Dinner, I confess, I only made dinner once this week...it was busy ok. Dear Hulu, you've got me hooked on the voice. I stay up way too late trying to finish the season. Just one more night. Part of the problem is that I can't watch tv when the kids are awake because they make noise and stand in front of the tv so I have to wait until they are in bed. Dear Irrigation, I don't love you because that means MUD everywhere. It also means all the bugs run towards the house and lots of wet muddy laundry. But the kids love you. They spent all day wallowing in the mud puddles with a nice sunburn to show for it. Dear HomeTeacher, thanks for feeding us and entertaining the kids. They loved the rides on the 4 wheeler and picking your unripe fruit off of your tree. Stinkers. Dear Sonic, happy hour is just that. Dear Hazel, you lost a tooth! You discovered it was loose and wiggled it. Thirty minutes later Emi pulled it out. You didn't panic or even cry. And it only took the Tooth Fairy 4 days to come. Dear Emi + Liam, I have enjoyed watching you play soft/base ball this week. You guys are doing great. Dear Will, you've been working long hours this week. That usually means we end up staying up way too late. I look forward to next weekend when you will get a short break. Dear Self, I didn't accomplish much this week other than hanging out with the kids. I don't even feel bad about it.

Friday Letters

Dear Children, school's OUT for summer!!! It's all good until I have to start entertaining you. Dear Busy, there have been SO many concerts, award ceremonies, shows, field trips, parties, celebrations, class snacks, ect. It will be a relief to take a break for a bit. Hopefully....I didn't think I was going to survive when I got a ginormous headache and had 3 programs to attend in one day. Dear Pointless, someone explain to me the point of all the kids having to go to school for 2 hrs on the last day? Dumb. I don't want to get up early for that. Of course the kids want to go to see their friends. Dear Hazel, you were so cute at your Kindergarten graduation. I am in denial a bit that you are going to be in 1st grade. My BAABYYY!! Dear Hailey, it was fun to go and watch what you have learned in cheer this year. You did great! Dear Avary, I loved watching your gymnastics class today. You won 2nd place and it's your first year of gymnastics. I can't wait to see what you are capable of! I guess all the times wee have gotten kicked from you practicing in the living room are paying off. Dear Kade, somehow you think that because school is out you will never see your friends again. They live 2 blocks away and you play with them every day so.... Dear Unnamed Child, you seem to break important rules right before there is something fun planned. Not in a small way, in a Big way! I hate having to allow/enforce the natural consequences and make you miss out on fun things. If you were going to break the rules why wouldn't you wait until after you got to do the big fun thing? Don't do that, I'm just saying....think it through!...How about think it all the way through and just don't break the rules at all and then we all have fun. Dear Awesome, I am so proud of my kids. They have all had to overcome really hard things this year. Each one has their own trials and they are all different. With some I didn't even care about grades, because at the time there was much bigger issues to face. They have pretty poor grades at the moment, BUT they have overcome way bigger, much harder, more important obstacles this year and I am so proud of them. Others also were dealing with bigger things, but managed to also end the year with all A's and B's when last quarter they were D's. Again I am so proud of them. My children haven't and don't have an easy or sheltered life so far and have had to deal with hardships that most adults never have to face. They make me wacko sometimes, but I am incredibly proud of my children. They try, they forgive, they love, they learn, they progress, they are so much more than you see. I am incredibly blessed to be their Mom. I am excited to watch them grow into the people they are meant to be. Dear Summer, here we go. The calendar has way too many days filled. I am hoping that it will feel more relaxed than it looks. I am hoping that somehow I will have more time to get my To Do list shortened, that the house will be clean, the kids will do their chores, and play and laugh. I imagine them reading and getting along hahaha. I'd settle for a clean house. Dear Moriah, I am so incredibly proud of you! Graduating high school and I'm missing it! I love you pretty girl! Proud Auntie. Dear Will, please know that -I am proud of you- I see your hard work. I see your sacrifice. I see you humble yourself. I see your kindness. I see you evolve and progress. I am blessed to have you by my side. We've been through a lot already, but it reassures me that we can make it through anything, together. I'm pretty sure you NEVER thought you would be living in a house with seven children. Coming home to a mess, your stapler and tape ALWAYS disappearing, having to step over bikes and sidewalk chalk and shoes, and then attacked with children, questions, hugs and kisses the moment you walk in the door. As we face the bigger trials that the Lord is giving us, I will be right there with you. And proudly wear the shirt that says "I'm with Icky" wink. wink. If that's what it takes. I love that we can laugh together even when we are faced with really hard things. Well...just make sure we are both laughing. When roaches are involved you are treading on very thin ground my love. very. thin. you are still learning. You think it's funny when I think it's horrific. I hope we are both spared from you having to learn this the hard way:) We are so very lucky. Dear Self, life can so very hard. But I am so very blessed. Just when I come to accept some things that I don't understand and wouldn't choose and hand it to the Lord and just decide to keep walking in faith even though I can't see, the Lord answers prayers, changes hearts that I didn't ever think would change and blesses me so much more than I deserve. He gives me peace in times of heartache. He gives me trials that humble me. He gives me strength when I just want to give up. He gives me forgiveness and the desire to want to forgive. He gives me the trials that I need to want to become better. And quickly reminds my heart when I complain that I am so blessed. Some days I just completely fail. How grateful I am to be able to start over each day.

Headaches

I hate it when my kids get bad headaches.

Probably because I know exactly what they are going through. I hate that I passed this on to them.

My Mamma passed in onto me and her Dad passed it on to her.

I don't get nearly as many as I used to,

 but just enough to make me super grateful for everyday I go without them.

I feel so sad every time my kids get a bad one and have to go to bed.

I say Boo to headaches!

Friday Letters

Dear Children, we are busy busy busy until school gets out. And then we are busy again for another month or so. Dear J, it was so fun talking with you about things I can only talk to you about! I am so excited to see you this summer, it's going to be so much fun! I love You! Dear Girls, I spent 4 hrs at gymnastics and a cheer show. You all did so great! I bought tickets for us all to go to the two shows, which was a little pricey if you must know. Kade got tired and grouchy half way through the first show and went to sit in the foyer. Hazel threw a fit about going to the second show. I didn't want them to go to waste, but there was no way I was taking them again just to ruin my time. Luckily I found a friend who was about to buy some and gave them to her. I love watching how they have improved! Dear Avary, this is your first year in gymnastics. Something you have dreamed of doing your whole life. You are built like a gymnast and super strong. You have just taken off and love every minute of it. You were so excited to do a peanut roll and front and back walk over. I am really excited to see what you are capable of in the future. Dear Hazel, your music concert was so adorable. You were a flower, the cutest flower. Dear Hailey, I just checked your grades and I am so proud of you for putting more effort into getting good grades. You went from not doing your homework with a D to ending with a 96%. Good enough for me. You are smarter than you realize. Dear Kade, not a day goes by that I don't thank the Lord for the blessings and  really the miracle of guiding us to Q96/Empower plus. It has changed your life from night to day. And mine from the deepest heartache to such a hopeful bright future for you. I can't wait to see what next year holds for you. It brings me to tears to think about what we have been through together, what you have been through, what our family has been through. I wish I could share this miracle with the world. Dear Mothers Day, I was awakened by the kids bringing me breakfast in bed. (i don't love food made by children). They made me pancakes from scratch, the kitchen is a witness of this. I though "oh this might be ok" and then Hazel with her smiling face shining up at me with excitement says "it's ok Mom only most of it fell on the floor so we just picked it up and put it back on the plate".......I was at a crossroads of what I "should do" and "what I wanted to do". I stared at it for so long, thanking them as they all stared waiting for me to take a bite. I decided to have Hazel show me the parts that didn't fall on the floor and became so full as soon as we ran out of those parts. I guess I can not say that I have never done that to them haha. Will had work all day, but left me a nice card and some pretty roses. After breakfast the kids ran out of their sweetness and were just lucky that I am their mother and love them anyway. Although getting a journal from each child with a note in it to be used each Mother's Day made me happy. Dear Becca, thank you for the note and for remembering me on Mother's day. You never forget those special days and that means a lot. I Love You! Dear Will, regardless of what this life throws at us you are the only person I want by my side. You are the one I want to weather the storm with, to laugh and cry with, sometimes both at the same time. I can see that the Lord wants our faith as a couple and as a family to be sure and unbreakable. And He is providing the many opportunities for us to strengthen our faith in Him and His plan for us. I can only imagine what the Lord has in store for our large family. Dear Self, for heaven sake can't I get a break! I must really need to be a better person because I always have trials that require me to walk around in the dark desperately trying to follow the spirit. Although I wouldn't trade what I gain from these trials, sometimes I want a longer space in between them. But I know the Lord knows better and always has a bigger blessing in store for me afterward. I am not as strong or capable as He thinks I am.

Friday Letters

Dear Children, I spent a couple of days away and really missed you. Even though you had a blast without me I'm very glad to be home with you. And tomorrow is a half day. And you are already giving me early Mother's Day gifts from school. Dear Break, spent a couple of days in Tucson this week. Tucson because it's close and it was cheap. Even though we spent most of the time running errands and having to replace all four tires on Will's car, it was a nice break. We did sleep late, but that would have been more effective if we had gotten to bed before 2 am. One night we did go to the hot tub at 10pm for a couple of hours, that was nice. Really I just enjoyed being with Will, it doesn't matter what we are doing. We also attended an event with UofA where Will's Dad was being recognized. I enjoyed that. Dear K, you are hands down the best "babysitter". My kids absolutely love you. And I know that they are being cared for not just taken care of. Thank You So Much! I would never be able to leave them without you. And you make me laugh, that too. Dear Busy, there is so much that goes on at the end of the school year. We came home to meetings and concerts and the whole weekend full of one practice or show or appointment after another. It's not the end it's just the beginning of the next two months completely full. Dear Tall People, after much research and store hopping we discovered that you can purchase Tall pants, 36 inseam, without being Big at Dillards. Your Welcome. Dear Hailey, your orchestra concerts are always interesting. But you did great. Dear Will, it was so nice spending time together. We need to do better at doing nothing when we have the chance. Not too surprising we stay up way too late and laugh until we cry...or laugh snort. I look forward to the next time. I love you :) Dear Self, sometimes choices in life bring so much worry and fear. And it's so hard not to make your choices out of fear. You actually have to make a conscious decision not to. I feel grateful that I've learned to recognize and go through the process of letting go of fear and replacing it with faith. Knowing how doesn't always make  it easy! I'm grateful that I can go to the Lord when I don't know what to do and feel comfort. I can't imagine living life without knowing my Father in Heaven hears and answers my prayers or that my Savior understands, paid for, and heals all of life's heartache and pain. And you know, I'm really lucky that I have a husband that I can talk with about all of these things. I'm lucky to have him.

Friday Letters

Picture that i don't have time to upload should go here

Dear Children, this week has flown by. It seems the closer we get to the end of the school year the faster the time goes. Dear Mesa, I spent the day in Mesa and just had to have a ginormous headache the whole time. I did enjoy having lunch with my Ma and sisters and nieces. I hate headaches. Dear Headaches, I have spent too much time with you this week. And getting another ginormous headache during our girls night while the boys are away made me so mad. I am pretty sure stress is the culprit. Dear Life, you know sometimes I feel like I am drowning and the weight of trials are just to heavy. You make it through one big thing just so you can start the next big hurdle. Give me a break. Dear Being Little, you run in the house after school drop your backpacks and run outside to play with the neighbor kids. I'm glad you guys have so much fun together. Dear Toys, and the kids other junk. I took everything out of the kids room and dumped it in the living room so I could organize and downsize. It has taken all week and is a much bigger job than I anticipated. It would be easier if we had a place to put things. Dear Friday, I just now realized it is in fact Friday. I have gone all day knowing but not really having it register. Dear Girls Night, Father Son camp out gives us girls some time. Sadly the headache ruined things for me. We got Chinese take out, had Dairy Queen and watched AFV and Dr. Who while making bracelets. Hazel found the entire thing to be boring and was very disappointed. Last year we did button crafts, ate out at La Casita, rode bikes and had a photo booth with fun props. This year I was very unprepared. Sad Face:( Dear Will, we had some good days this week and some eh days this week. Either way I love you as much as ever, Forever. Dear Self, sometimes I feel capable and strong and others I feel so incapable of of dealing with what is placed before me. Faith and more faith and pray for even more faith. That is all I can do.