this may look meaningless, but don't let it fool you. The old one kept falling down and hitting me in the head and making me furious. Every. Day. I am VERY happy to see this thing all shiny and staying where it is supposed to be.
Dear Children, it has been a long couple of weeks and you have survived it pretty well. You have made good friends with our new neighbors while I've been in bed, which seems to be a good thing. You have done your best to just make the best of it all.
Dear Everything Else, there are so many things that happen, get squeezed in, worked out, fit in. I don't remember now.
Dear Sis's, you came to my rescue when I needed you the most. Picking up prescriptions, when I am certain it was not convenient. To driving 3 hours with your children in tow to take care of me ALL night and all day long. Not just me but my kids too. It was a relief for them to have you here when I have been so useless. I really can't thank you enough. For real. And it's a perk when your sis is a CNA and she has to help you pee cause you know she has had to see and do much worse. Although...she's in the NICU now...great...well I LOVE you so so much for all that you did for me. It makes me cry I am so grateful.
Dear Just so You Know, when I needed help I texted my sis, and she replied asking if I had become a drunkard. So I had Will read it and it was indeed drunkardness and unintelligible. So he called asked one if she could drop everything and run to the Dr. for a new script, which she did. And asked the other if she could get in her car and drive 3 hours straight here to take care of me because Will had to go out of town and I was in a bad way. They did this for me! It was no vacation, she even got my kids to clean. I am blessed that it fell on her day off of work, but she went home and had to work that night. I'm still a little fragile emotionally apparently. Because it makes me cry.
Dear Life, you just keep on going on. Even when a mans down life goes on. And I have failed miserably this last couple of weeks at keeping up and getting the kids where they need to be. I admit they have skipped some things.
Dear Janice, thankyou for setting up my Norwex party online for me. I can't do my in home party this month (for obvious reasons) but I am so excited about it. I have absolutely loved everything I have that is Norwex. And I save so much money on chemical free cleaner. We have asthma/allergies around here so this is the absolute best stuff I have found. I have so many favorites I can't live without any of them now. Here is a link if you want to know more. And this is just because I love it.
www.janiceswilor.norwex.biz Remember to put me as your hostess with the mostess! (Camille Clark).
Dear Friends, thank you all of you have been checking on me. Even though I try and keep most things under the wraps that are super hard for me. I do appreciate you.
Dear Will, are there words for you. True, you had one grumpy morning and day and made me cry. And I said you were a MeanFace. But that has been overshadowed by all the wonderful selfless things you do for me and my kids. I know that right now there really isn't anything I can do for you, I can't even make you yummy food to fatten you up for heaven sake! What has my life come to! Even so I know that you have been trying so hard to do what you can. You work long hours and come home and have been taking care of me and then trying not to lose one of the seven kids running around. I admire this because I know that you have absolutely no. idea. what I am going through physically or emotionally, even though I try to explain it to you a million times, when you haven't felt extreme physical pain how do you imagine it? You get a back ache and take a Tylenol and I'm baffled. What I appreciate so much is that you are so lost on experience here, but you are giving so much of yourself to help me. I do love you more than you will ever know in this life.
Dear Self, I should give myself a pep talk. I'm really not up for it today. Some days I can think positive and others I feel so useless. Some days I just know that with this, hopefully last, surgery life is going to change and be so different, I know I will be healed. And others I just want to cry. I won't lose my faith though. And when it gets low I beg the Lord for more. I know I am being shaped into the person that the Lord needs me to be, sometimes I feel like I am failing there, but I want to become the person He sees in me. And boy, do I have a long way to go.
